An Ode to No One

Bryant Lukes Prince George, BC, CA

I was 11. It was the first CD I ever bought. Bullet was devastating Muchmusic with the mood of emptiness, lathargy, hope, isolation, and bondage that I was feeling. “An Ode to No one” without the fuck you on the album back cover got it past my Mom’s censorship. An album of greaty beauty immediately fast forward to “here is no why”, “bullet”, and “to forgive”. No time to listen to it in its entirety until Friday… Cue Robert Smith..

Christmas Tour Tickets

Marquise Brack Seattle, WA, US

Growing up SP was my favorite band (and is!). When they were touring MCIS my parents told me I was too young to go to the concert (I was 10 and utterly devastated). Christmas Day came and the very last present under the tree was a pair of tickets to the Seattle show my Dad had gifted me. Sorry, Mom! Unforgettable show and the best Christmas gift of all time. Thanks, Dad!

I Will Always Remember….

Melissa Hartley Baltimore, MD, US

I remember getting Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness (double album) on the day it came out, October 24, 1995. It was on a Tuesday, remember when they would release albums on Tuesdays?? Those were the days! I was in 8th grade living my best life! I had saved my chore money to buy it. I came home did my homework right away. I just couldn’t wait until my dad got off work to take me to the music store to get it. As soon as he pulled in the driveway I ran to his truck! On the way I talked his poor ear off about how much I idolized the Smashing Pumpkins and that this record would be rocking! As soon as I entered the record store I took off! I couldn’t wait for my dad, I wanted that record! I remember just running over to the releases and there it was! I think I screamed and jumped up and down lol! When I got into the car I ripped open the plastic on the cd. I checked the cool art work throughout the inside. When I got home I rushed upstairs and put on the first cd….my young mind was blown. I then listened to the second cd….still I was blown away. I just couldn’t believe the sound that was coming from my speakers….I must have listened to it three before going to bed. I took it to school with me the next morning to show my friends and to listen to it on my disc-man at recess. I was totally in love with this record by far….Fast forward 25 years to 2020. I still listen to this record a lot. I can’t tell you how many times certain songs saved me from that album especially when I was super depressed and lonely over the years. It’s funny how I can sit here and remember that day back in 1995. To this day my love for the Smashing Pumpkins has never changed…

But no one’s asking for the truth, So let me tell you

Noni Newcastle, NSW, AU

I hesitated to submit anything here, because when I try to think back to those times, I mostly just feel detached.  My brain put a lot of effort into sealing those kodak moments and a lot of that pain away, and the end result is that I don’t really remember a lot of details and I doubt my ability to genuinely convey the difference this album made to my tiny little world, Obviously in the end I decided to just blurt that out and let you all make of it what you will, because whilst 25 years later I might not be able to explain how I felt back then with any eloquence, I can confidently say that having that music to connect to, and giving me one small private space where it was ok to feel pain and rage and resentment and hurt and honesty and tenderness and hope and even just pleasure in the pure beauty of sound, that made all the difference in the world to me.

And I do believe that being fortunate enough to have the option of an emotional outlet that acknowledged and reflected the full variety of feelings that make up life, left me better off as a person. Life isn’t made up of just anger, or sadness, or happiness. It’s not just tender, or harsh, or warm, or cold. It’s all of those things and a million more and I think that’s something that MCIS demonstrates beautifully.  I will always appreciate having the escape, and having that emotional outlet, but I think looking back as an adult I have a new found appreciation for the honesty and integrity of that larger statement, and for the personal investment it must have required to create a single work that encompasses so much.

Mellon Collie takes you by the hand, and leads you through, then tucks you safely into bed.

As Far As You Take Me

Chris Adelaide, AU

MCIS was the very first CD I ever had. I got a copy on my 12th birthday when I got my first CD player. I had seen the video clip for BWBW and I thought it was incredibly cool. I also liked the idea of getting a double album because it gave me more to listen to. My parents weren’t overly impressed by the track An Ode to No One, mainly because of the full title in the booklet (they were less impressed later that year when I purchased AntiChrist Svperstar, but that’s another memory).

I’m grateful for how good MCIS was, and the impact it has had on me. I became a guitarist because of this album, and for the past 25 years have made amazing friends and memories because of what this album inspired in me as a musician. If I had bought another CD I suspect my life would have been very different – this album has had such a big influence on me. 

The silence of the middle 8…

Robb Swansea, GB

Seeing the live at Brixton (UK) on MTV made me realise that SPs were the best band in the world.. world .. world..  The silence for the middle 8 of BWBW and how perfectly they came back in. Full Tilt Incredible!!!!

Best lyric of all time….

And you know you’re never sure

But you’re sure you could be right

If you held yourself up to the light

(PS much better than ‘The Wall’)

Mellon Collie tour memories 95-97

Andrea IL, US

From hearing the album debuted live and in person at the Riv Oct of ‘95,  to grabbing our first actual copy from Sam Goody in our local mall, the album has always been the soundtrack to our lives. It helped us get through some pretty hopeless times as teenagers. It’s stuck with us for 25 years and still  has major significance, every single day.

Muzzle, In the Arms of Sleep, and Beautiful will always be my go to when I need to be comforted. The memories will always be with me! Thank you, SP, for a lifelong of amazing music.

First Album Purchased

Rachael Cary, NC, US

I was 8 years old when MCIS was released. It was the first album I ever purchased (on CD). I remember in 5th grade my music teacher at school let us bring in songs to play for the entire class and I picked  “Tonight, Tonight”. This album and the songs still mean so much to me.

Lifting Spirits from the Depths of Hardship

Cyrus New York, NY, US

I was never an avid music lover and shamelessly bore that label for much of my youth, knowing nothing about SP except for one song: Cherub Rock, since it was available on Rock Band and, needless to say, the hardest song on which to play the drums.

When COVID-19 unleashed itself onto our fragile world and quarantine subsequently ensued, I figured it was time to expand and discover my empirical musical tastes. Now sitting in mandated isolation, I began exploring and took a chance on the Pumpkins. Gish and Siamese Dream earned their much-deserved praise, but nothing could’ve prepared me for the monster that was to immediately follow: MCIS. Furiously blasting metal riffs and simultaneously soothing the senses with ballads and pop harmonies, this beauty of a record has everything for any genre enthusiast. As I witnessed the world going mad and no longer making sense, for 2 hours those worries evaporated and I allowed myself to be immersed in Billy’s epic fantasy. No other album can recreate the awe of coming across such an art gem, instilling both joy and a renewed hope for a better tomorrow.

It all started…..

Rebecca Wemyss Ottawa, Ontario, CA

I get asked why I decided to learn how to play the cello. I decided the night of the 1996 MTV awards to learn how to play the cello solely because I thought ‘Tonight, Tonight’ was the best song I had ever heard. I loved the orchestral arrangement and wanted to learn how to play the cello at that exact moment. Almost 25 years later, I’m still playing the cello and so many opportunities have come my way because I decided at that exact moment to take music seriously

The Day of Release

Brett Hickman Lansing , US

This is me describing the day of the album’s release. I bought the album and listened to it with my sister, who is also a fan.

Swapping CDs on the school bus

Andrew Roanoke, VA, US

When I was in high school, my friend and I always switched CDs on the bus ride home and listen to each other’s music. Then I got into SP and for a week I listened to the first half of MCIS. My friend asked me to switch it up, so I put in the second half of MCIS. We quit swapping shortly thereafter. 

First album I bought

Emily Parmelee, SD, US

MCIS was the very first album I bought with my own money. I had bought the BWBW cassette single and my preteen self was juat captivated. When I bought MCIS I opened the package, put it in my cd player and listened to the full album front to back singing along to every song with the lyric book included. I dunno how many times I did this, but I learned the words to every song. I know it’s cliche to say, but that album really did change my life in a musical sense and sel-expression sense. Music became a way for me to connect emotionally and let my feelings out by singing and listening to these songs. I had grown up listening to a lot of older music my parents listened to, but this year and with SP guiding my way, I found myself through music. And I love that with SP and BC I can still do that now with them as a 30-something adult. Thank you for the music all these years BC and SP. Forever a fan. Love Always,  Emily

The Smashing Pumpkins at Soma, San Diego

John New York, NY, US

Memories taken from packet written in Middle School, 1996.

Best Concert Memory

Andrew Saco, Me, US

I used to work for the sole purpose of going to see live music. My friends and I were lucky to have lived in a time when everyone could still access floor seats to a concert. 

We saw this tour stop in Hartford, CT.  It was a fantastic show. After the encore everyone started to file out of the venue. I noticed the lights didn’t come up yet. After convincing my friends to stay put because the lights didn’t come up yet. We waited and we waited and after about 45 minutes the band came back out on the stage. 

Awesome.

Billy took the mic and announced something along the lines of “now that the people who have heard their MTV hits have left we can play some music.” The Smashing Pumpkins played pretty much an entire extra set of new work, things you were working on, etc. What a great show. 

Thanks for that memory. 

I look forward to everything you have coming up.

Andy

The Infinite Sadness

Jane Richards Portland, OR, US

This was the first Smashing Pumpkins album that my dad showed me. We would drive for ever until we finished it. And when he was diagnosed with cancer and had to shave off all his hair I always said that he looked like billy. Although his favorite song was drown, this will always be our album. 

Memories of the future past

Rodrigo Castel La Paz, BO

June 2020, while walking through La Paz City after months of lockdown, I listened to “Mellon Collie and the infinite Sadness” for the first time. Those piano notes made me feel one with the World, egoless, time stopped. Eternalized in a picture, I felt so lucky and grateful to be alive. Can someone forget this pandemic? 

Hospital

Lachlan Lucan, IE

I was admitted to hospital with a very serious illness about 2 years ago and was in ICU for a number of weeks. Couldn’t use my phone and all I had was a discman while I was there. The first album I asked for was MCIS and it really helped me in my recovery, the themes of hope and the beautiful soundscapes got me through many a lonely time while I was there. Thank you eternally.

Youth Soundtrack

Kyle Dunn Mount Carmel, IL, US

In short, MCIS has been a soundtrack to my entire teenage years.  Through love woes, sad days, pandemic lockdowns, and drives with friends, this album has gotten me through it all.  “By Starlight” is especially dear to me, I treasure the song immensely.  Will love MCIS forever <3

Growing up with SP

Asher FL, US

the pumpkins have been and still are my favourite band of all time. I found out about them mainly from my mother, whom was a big SP fan growing up. The MCIS album has stuck with me for years, and I played the album on repeat during some of the hardest times. Thank you so much.

1979, Rain, Biking & Coffee

Krish Gupta New Delhi, Delhi, IN

One year ago, September 2019, the dull smell of rain in the air. After a long day at school I come home tired, wondering where it all went wrong. Took out my bicycle and decided to got for a ride all alone. Somewhere along the way, 1979 came on very randomly. I like that song. Gave me the feeling of being loved and having loads of good friends again. Gave me my simple dream of being accepted again. Gave me hope that better days will come. As I rode I reached a pretty bad coffee shop but still I sat there and listened to 1979. And now, “As you can see there’s no one around”. I know I’m still a kid but I don’t know when I’ll be happy again so I listen to this song to just get hope. 

Car Crash non-superstar

Sam Valdes Mexico City, Mexico. , MX

My parents took me to a weddint to Matamoros. We had free time, so we went to Brownsville and they bought me MCIS as a Christmas Present. The day after the wedding, we were driving South towards Tampico, when the car axle broke. My uncle was driving and he kept us safe.
My MCIS jewelcase cracked, CDs were fine, except for a scratch from a piece of jewel case.

i made my own poster of the smashing pumpkins

ernesto los angeles,California , US

this is a poster of the single of 1979

Musicland

Stanley Foss Ca, US

I bought MCIS at Musicland (which closed many years ago) in Monterey, CA in 10/28/95. I kept the receipt because I just knew this was going to be something special and a day to be remembered. I took the album to my best friends house and we listened to the whole thing straight through and we’re captivated. My favorite lyric is ‘Suffer my desire for you’; it says everything in 5 words. This album would become the soundtrack to my youth. 

Family/teenage memories

Nadine la, Ca , US

I was 14 or 15 when I saw you guys live for the first time. Went to this gig with my cousins. The plus was seeing you for the fist time and my other favorite band Garbage for the first time. I’m so glad I got to experience this with family. Next time I saw you live was Ava Adore tour with a good opening band Stabbing Westward, then again recently with my brother in law,  for the tour with Liam Gallagher. All such great memories

My First CD

Brett Lee Oceanside, CA, US

When I turned 13 years old, I got for my birthday my first CD player. With birthday money in hand, I rushed to the record store to buy my first CD: Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness, the latest from the Smashing Pumpkins.  See, even at that time I was already a fan, but I had to settle with listening to friends’ copies or *gasp* dubbings to a cassette. That album, every second of it, became burned into my memory. Every middle school, adolescent tragedy, crush, and heartbreak had these song playing in the background. I love that album and still listen to it start to finish often.