I was born in December 1995.
Safe to say, I missed out on the hype, praise and astonishment over the initial release of Mellon Collie & the Infinite Sadness two months prior to my birth. I discovered the Pumpkins way later, in 2010, and after running through their first two masterpieces; Gish and Siamese Dream I came across their magnum opus, the album which was to become the sound of my youth.
It’s a strange feeling, describing Mellon Collie, because nothing else compares to it – musically, lyrically, thematically and aesthetically, it creates its own reality.
28 songs, where no two songs share a common root, where no two songs touch on the same subject. To my 15 year old self, the album incapsulated everything I felt at the time and everything I was searching for. Sadness, restlessness, elation, love and boredom were only some of those feelings. Listening to the album was like entering another world through a rabbit hole of tone. It brought nihilism, but also hope. It was falling in love but also out of love. It was simply, life.
The grandeur of the album is presented in a format which challenges you, and is especially challenging to someone who isn’t familiar with many of its genres. This is without a shadow of a doubt the most diverse album to have ever been recorded.
It spawns everything from dream-pop (Cupid De Locke), metal (Jellybelly, Zero), alternative rock (Here Is No Why, Muzzle, Bodies), folk (Lily, Goodnight), prog-rock (Thru the Eyes of Ruby, Porcelina of the Vast Oceans) and many, many more genres.
The selling point of Mellon Collie is not that it has something for everybody, its that it has everything.
The songwriting is immaculate, the overarching sadness and darkness tangible, and the scope endless. With lyrics such as “tell me I am still the man I’m supposed to be” (Galapogos), and “I fear that I am ordinary, just like everyone” (Muzzle) its clear that Corgan was in a complete state of focus and translucent thought when writing this record. The lyrics are sentimental and personal, but never detached. They feel real, they feel as real as anything else I’ve experienced. I can’t say the same for many other albums.
I’ve cried to By Starlight, I’ve jumped up and down to X.Y.U. and been jealous of songs like Beautiful and Thirty-Three. I say jealous, because this album inspired me to start writing my own songs over ten years ago, as I’m sure it has for tens of thousands of other teens.
Ultimately, I must have listened to Mellon Collie & the Infinite Sadness over a thousand times by now, at least once a week since I first discovered it. It is without a doubt the only album I would take to a desert island, and the only album I can say is truly flawless in its deliverance and message.
And so I thank you Billy. I imagine it was all but easy for you to make this record happen. You gave us the pinnacle of alternative rock, and to me – the pinnacle of my musical experiences.
It’s the only