I wouldn’t be here without it.

So the video was of me at 13. I’m on the right. It’s kind of embarrassing but there wasn’t SP merch around my rural town back then. I wish I had a ZERO pic to share! Anyway, my story begins years earlier when I was 11 in ‘95.  I was tormented in school and abused at home. There was no safe place for me until I was borrowed Mellon Collie. I cradled my radio and cried through both albums over and over. There was anger, beauty, love, unrequited love, loneliness, sadness and gorgeous imagery to lose myself to.  Billy and SP have been my sanctuary ever since. It encouraged me to pick up a guitar at 15 and teach myself to play tabs and piano. I went though 3 Mellon Collie books from carrying them around so much and writing notes in them in high school. I slept outside for 3 nights in freezing weather to see SP perform when I was 15 at a small music store. I later got 5 SP hearts tattooed on me, had a daughter and named her Starla after Billy because without him I would have killed myself and she would have never been born. A couple of  years later, instead of The Wedding March, I walked down the isle to Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness to my husband who met me because of our love of SP. That album has helped me get through so many amazing and very hard times in my life. The last good memory I have of my mom before she died 2 years ago was going to the rest home and playing SP songs off that album for her because she was the only one who ever encouraged and indulged my love of your music. It made her so happy.  She couldn’t say many things after her first stroke almost 8 years before but she talked about “guitar” and “Billy” among a few other things to me quite often. You’ve all meant so much to me and my family and I’m so proud I can take my kids to your concerts now. I’m here because of you and especially Mellon Collie and so are they. Thank you eternally.